Thursday, June 5, 2008

Abang Superman's Sexual Ethics 101

"Arrrggghhhh! Please don't expose my sexual preferences! Vincit + Reformanda + Brigette will come after me........", Abang Superman

Abang Superman, as we all know, is the paragon of good. Problem is, Kryptonian ethics and our Earth ethics sometimes differ in small ways. Let's see what the Big Blue thinks about sexuality. The answer may shock you...

Hmmm... it looks like Abang Superman does not approve of incest! Ok, no problem there, right? (Except I've always fantasized about a Kal-Kara horizontal mambo... but that's just me, right?)

However, Kal-El is fully supportive of BESTIALITY! Here's Abang Superman falling in love with an ikan-duyung aka mermaid Lori Lemaris aka a fish! So, Kal, kissing cousins = bad. Kissing fishes = good! (Belum cuba, belum tau. Sudah cuba, hari-hari mau!!!)


Abang Superman is also not above using his X-Ray vision on other GUYS! Word has it that was how he learned Batman's secret identity as Bruce Wayne (go ask John Byrne). So if you're a girl and Abang Superman is staring at you intently, don't sue him for sexual harrassment. He's actually looking THROUGH you and spying on the Brother behind you instead!!!

As for Lois, well, she's actually into all sorts of weird shit like gang-banging the whole JLA for instance... Aren't you glad that your kids are growing up reading this stuff? More to come..... :)

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Edmund,
I wonder why Jenson never comment on your real life postings. Perhaps he only want to choose sites!

Simon

Anonymous said...

Actually some people are just too fried to know what's genuine and what's fake.

Pablo

Cikgu Screwtape said...

Hi Pablo,

What's really funny is that when I write stuff about X-Men, Eternals, Abang Superman, General Zod, etc. THAT'S THE REAL ME! But I never get any comments... *Sigh!*

Then, once in a while, I write some shit about church or theology or Scripture and I get tons of comments from SIN fundies, German Lutherans, Jenson, etc.

Guess nobody likes a joker...

~ Edmund

p/s - Perhaps I should move beyond literary gags and actually go out to do some real damage, like poisoning the Gotham River or something?

Anonymous said...

Small mind. Small focus. Small talk. (small dick?)

Pablo

Anonymous said...

Do you know the origin of wearing underwear out front? The British did it! This white blooded dude saw these dhoti wearing sammys pulling linen by the river ganges on a hot day while the white dude was getting rashes in his longjohn and he thought why not get ventilated? His idea was passed on to the 2nd generation and guess who was the bastard son? Alan Moore! He was an extra in Gandhi movie. He's the white dude washing himself in the river ganges scene. So blame the wearing of underwear upfront on the bloody brits.

Simon

Anonymous said...

Rubbish! Vincent the aquaman wore his underwear upfront first. He even got a designer stain where his crock was. ('was' - rumours had it he got decapitated)

Mike

Cikgu Screwtape said...

Actually I hardly wear any underwear to prevent "salah parking".

~ Edmund

Jenson said...

Hi Edmund,

That because the last comics I read were Tintin and Astrix. I moved on to fictional books (esp Agatha Christie) soon after.

My life went downhill when I bought my first computer.

Jenson

ACE68 said...

TinTin? Oh, you mean snowy!

bad dog.

Anonymous said...

I think you meant A-S-T-E-R-I-X. Edmund played obelix in school. Now he's using lutherans as menhir. I think the romans are calvinist. The Gauls? they are brethren. Ha ha ha!

You have a cool selection of comics. Not bad.

Simon

Anonymous said...

Hey Jensonboy, I was into Sherlock Holmes before they made the PC. I watched the complete Hercule Poirot so I kept myself going uphill. I was a genius but jealous Aceboy called me loco. If you comment like that I don't see why we can't get along.

If you want to stay alive in this blog, try this:
Read: Warren Ellis, Transmetropolitan

Hit: www.willeisner.com

Now begone.

Pablo
(Pablo 2 Exams 0!!!!)
(Hey Aceboy - I passed!)

Cikgu Screwtape said...

I've never read Tintin, Asterix, Agatha Christie, Hercule Poirot, etc. But I've read lots of comics.

~ Edmund

Anonymous said...

Fats,
I am at it again. Bad. Age of Empire, Brian Talbot. Did you read the free Freakangel online? London has enough shitholes for graphic novel ideas. Talbot's take on London is brain damage.

Saw the complete 2020 set and its for sale at indecent price. Now, how do I get back to the fork at the beginning of the road?

Pltypus
(Its alright ma, I'm only bleeding)

Cikgu Screwtape said...

Whoa! You found Talbot's "Age of Empire"? Dangerous, man! You're gonna get hooked all over again. Also, Delano's "2020 Visions"? I don't know what to say.

Actually, London is still the pop-culture capital of the world. Maybe Jenson really should take a look outside his window and absorb some good stuff before he gets brain-damage from all the history of denominations that he's studying.

I've got 37 issues of Millar on my hands. Burning into my mind. About Jean rollerskating in London like it's the Mecca of Poplorica. Then Proteus attacks. Next stop is "Old Man Logan", a post-apocalyptic take on the world with Logan as a Mad Max type of character going on the road...

"Old Man Logan" Part 1 (of 8) MARK MILLAR and STEVE MCNIVEN—who last teamed for the monumental CIVIL WAR—bring us the most important WOLVERINE story of the 21st Century. Nobody knows what happened on the night the heroes fell. All we know is that they disappeared and evil triumphed and the bad guys have been calling the shots ever since. What happened to Wolverine is the biggest mystery of all. For 50 years, no one has heard hide nor hair from him…and in his place stands an old man called Logan. A man concerned only about his family. A man pushed to the brink by the HULK GANG. A man forced to help an old friend—the blind archer, HAWKEYE—to drive three thousand miles to secure his family's safety. Get ready for the ride of your life, Logan. IN STORES: June 11, 2008

Previews are at: http://www.newsarama.com/php/multimedia/album.php?aid=18025

~ Edmund

Anonymous said...

Actually I am reading History of Christian Thought and 20th Century Theology side by side with Transmet and Age of Empire. (!) That is the best way to balance out the sanitized view of the world from the lens of church history. The world is filth and denominations are just an excuse to skip over this disaster that we called society. Denominations succeeds because or unfortunately, the great evangelical disaster is here. Pity the poor sods who still quote tin-tin! Welcome to the protestant ghetto.

I am staying far away from 2020 Visions. Not suicidal yet!

Pltypus