Saturday, June 21, 2008


BAD SIGNAL: On Friday June 27, I'll be doing an onstage appearance in conjunctionwith the Wizard World Chicago convention in Rosemont, Illinois, byarrangement of Avatar Press.
The thing is happening at the Donald E. Stephens Convention Center --

If a baptist- mini -stirred were to learn something, he would be at wizard. Yeah, popcorn and coke. Never mind. Just cola will do. Sure get the publications but make sure the suits are all hidden. No serious independent reader would like to to be told he been word-ed and press-ed into a mold called ministry. Anyway, if Warren Ellis were a baptist this is how he will conduct the show. A one act stage performance. Weep. People will think it's the Holy Spirit.

The event is free. It is my understanding that you do not need a conventionticket to enter. So, whether you're attending the convention or not, youcanshow up for this and get in with no problems.

Lesson no.1 get the brainwashed mass in. Don't let them think you are capitalist pig. Even if you are one, hide your knuckles. Let them know they are part of a convention that will change the world. This sells. People think they still can change the world. It's a capitalist thing. Open the doors, let the herd in and sell them the manuals for a convention speacial of one hunrdred and maybe fifty more. So even if they don't attend, they get this heavy tome back to add to the other tomes from convention past. One tome at a time. One brick at a time, hide them behind convention walls and use sublimal messaging from Pink Floyd for credibility. Who would figure baptist actually are changing the world? One herd at a time. People would think its the great commission.

Important point. I will be smoking onstage. You will not be smoking inthe convention center. This event has been categorised, believe it or not,as performance art. As having access to nicotine is essential to myperformance,I have been accorded the right to smoke. You will all have to suffer.

Did I say warren Ellis is a prick? Ellis IS a prick. Do you know convention speakers get stage preferential treatment? They get to drink diet coke. So they get to prance around in their suit and monkey tie, showing off they newly learned hip-hop YOs! while sounding still like a half-fucked baptist. And guess what? The herd actually YOs back! People would think that is good preaching. The manual sold on preaching said so.

The format for this appearance is Q&A. the herd moves in unison This is where I take questionsfrom the audience, and then ramble on at length about five other thingswithout even getting within the same zipcode as your actual question.So, there's no prepared talk this time, it's just me cueing off questionsfrom the floor, telling stories, and pretending to dispense The StarryWisdom while actually telling you nothing of worth or relevance.

Just when you thought it's safe to speak up, they put a boot in your mouth. Some independent type would ramble about puppies, whore and Da Vinci tee shirts. That is considered a renewed zest for authentic now-existence. People would call you contemporary. For a baptist mini-stirred, the heavens open to unleashed a grand opportunity for him to ramble. Q & A is actually the orgasm peak for ministers who have kept it inside too long. I mean Warren Ellis sprayed his audience didn't he?

**Well, who says a baptist can provide an immersion experience?

Also: yes, the story earlier changed versions a couple of times. What eventually came out was that although,naturally, the circumstances reported aren't matchingthe various stories circulating through back channels. so I can't get into this as deeply as I'd like, but this is interesting for a lot of reasons, none of them good. Sadly, I don't think all this summarize a convention expereince. As for the one act herd trooping off with this newly purchase convention special, I think they're goingto have a very good day tomorrow. I hate this. I dunno. I might read a bit from Ellis or something.

This has been WORD: Warren Ellis One Act - A Baptist lay (er, play.)

are you tired of being lied to?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The puppies are away on church camp for further indoctrination. Its feels good to comment!

(if you cant see the differece, you FUCKED!)